Posted by Leslie Simon on Jul 28, 2009 in
book stuff,
life stuff Hey party people,
If you’re not already following me on Twitter (@redpatterndress), you totes should! No, freals… not only will following me boost your emo cred, but it’ll also help find a cure for lactose intolerance. Okay, that last part isn’t entirely true, but it could be! Sorta. Not really. Gah!!
Seriously, though, I’ve decided to run super-radtastic giveaways every time I add 100 followers. The winner of my first contest was the amazing @hoppusfanmuch who won the cutest lil’ goodie bag put together by yours truly. It contained:
+
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Do the right thing, Spike Lee-style, and follow me on Twitter!! In case you can’t remember my handle, it’s @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress, @redpatterndress!!!
Tags: excess amounts of cuteness, style stuff, wish you were here
Posted by Leslie Simon on Jul 26, 2009 in
work stuff I’m tres busy slaving away on my first cover story in forevs. However, I thought I should pause to admire my own literary brilliance. (Because I’m modest like that.) Truth be told, this might be the most fave sentence I’ve scribbled in ages:
“Unlike on the No Doubt tour, there are no Housewives Gone Wild here; instead, you’ve got a fine selection of neon-clad, pint-sized Hayley clones, dudes with the back of their neck’s pierced (ouch!), and zit-faced teenage couples who look like they’re one face-sucking session away from appearing on MTV’s 16 And Pregnant.”
It’ll make much more sense in context. Trust.
Tags: literary brilliance, paramore
Posted by Leslie Simon on Jul 22, 2009 in
life stuff There’s prolly a reason why most people, people with greener thumbs and more common sense than me, don’t buy plants and such at Ikea. That reason is that said plants die—like, a really brutal death and stuff. A moment of silence for the death of my kitchen cactus. He’s been in poor health for a while, but it looked like he was gonna pull through. Sadly, he took a turn for the worse last night and went to the big plant farm in the sky.
Sniff, sniff.
This is my open casket—er, garbage can—viewing.
For those of you lucky to have met my sickly cactus, I hope he touched your life. He was kind of good like that, always looking to make a difference and make people feel special. Feel free to share your stories here. If we keep his memory alive, he’ll never be forgotten.
Tags: i'm a plant murderer
Posted by Leslie Simon on Jul 18, 2009 in
life stuff,
music stuff While I was distracting myself with a lil’ telly (so that I could avoid transcribing the final two Paramore interviews), I happened to turn on MTV and see The All-American Rejects hosting an episode of Cribs. Immediately, I was struck with two thoughts:
1. I had no idea they still made Cribs.
2. Doth my eyes deceive me or is that my literary awesomeness I see on the screen??? Okay, technically speaking, it’s a snipe of the first AAR cover for Alternative Press but I wrote it so, by the transitive property, I WAS TOTALLY ON CRIBS TODAY!! See for yourself…
BAM! Right side of the screen!!
BLOOP! Left side of the screen!
BING!! Hiding on the left side of the screen!!
Back in my old Cleveland apartment, I even had the same poster displayed in my office-slash-dining area. (Man, do I miss that place. Best. Apartment. Ever.) Lookie…
BAH-ZING!! Great interior decorators thing alike.
Thanks, Nick Wheeler, for totes making my day!!
Tags: delish home decor, fans, the all-american rejects
Posted by Leslie Simon on Jul 17, 2009 in
book stuff,
life stuff Holy balogna!! The feverishly handsome and awesomely brilliant John Oakes sent me the dopest tech skins that just-so-happen to pimp a lil’ book written by you-know-who. SQUEAL!! I can hardly contain my self-promotional pride. What do you guys think?? Is my MacBook well-dressed or what?
Spanks, DiNG!! I heart your guts so bad!!
Tags: style stuff, well-dressed technological gadgets, wish you were here
Posted by Leslie Simon on Jul 16, 2009 in
life stuff Les Simes
7:51
um, it’s prolly a bad idea that i’m watching “the 650-lb virgin” right now, huh?
Rachel Lux
7:52
hahahahahaha
only bad because I can’t watch it, too
Les Simes
7:52
homeboy lost 450 pounds or something
and now he’s looking for someone to give his gift™ to
Rachel Lux
7:52
and he still weighs 650?
Les Simes
7:52
no, now’s he’s 220
Rachel Lux
7:52
ah
Les Simes
7:52
he used to be 650
so, really, the title is misleading
Rachel Lux
7:53
holy shitballs
Les Simes
7:53
it should be “guy who used to be 650 lbs but is now decent-looking wants to get laid”
Tags: tlc has the best reality programming ever!
Posted by Leslie Simon on Jul 7, 2009 in
book stuff,
music stuff When I was contacted by Dave at Oklahoma Lefty about doing an interview for him and his bitchin’ blog, I was stoked beyond words. Two of my dearest bros are from the lovely city of Edmond, so I feel like I’m kind of an Okie by association. I think the Q&A turned out awesome, especially because I heart being called “ultra-hilarious.” Score!
I’m feverishly trying to do a million-and-a-half different things before I get on a jetplane tomorrow and fly to St. Louis, where I’ll be meeting up with Paramore on Wednesday. Eek!! I feel like I’m really breaking out of the retirement home for this piece because I haven’t written anything like it in what seems like a coon’s age. Truth be told, I’m nervous. There… I said it. In fact, I’m nervous, excited, anxious and eager. Howev, most of all, I’m looking forward to a juicy dish sesh with Hayley & Co.
(Fingers crossed!)
Be sure to add me on Twitter—in case you’re not already doing so—because I’m sure I’ll be unloading all sorts of finger-lickin’-good deets when I’m on the road. Get into it!!
Tags: frequent flyer miles, music, paramore, road life, wish you were here
Posted by Leslie Simon on Jul 2, 2009 in
book stuff,
music stuff The radtastic Miss Lauren Becker over at Shooting Stars Magazine did a lil’ Q&A with lil’ ol’ me. The online zine is super kick-ass and there are some amazing author interviews on there. You should most def take some time and check it out—if for nothing more than to read my deep and eloquent thoughts on Gilmore Girls and Angels & Kings!! I’m talking about ground-breaking revelations, people.
Also, if you aren’t already following me on Twitter, GET WITH THE PROGRAM!! You can find me at http://www.twitter.com/redpatterndress. I’m leaving next week to spend some QT with this really small, unknown band. You prolly haven’t heard of them. They’re called Paramore and I think they’re gonna be HUGE one day. I’ll be hanging with them for a couple days so you won’t want to miss a moment!
Tags: gilmore girls, music, wish you were here
